Ever thought of having a team of crows at your command? If you’ve ever wished for a little extra help in taking down your foes, it might be time to consider the advantages of befriending these intelligent and resourceful birds. Crows are more than just spooky, black birds; they are sharp, clever creatures with a memory to rival an elephant’s, and they might just be the secret weapon you’ve been missing. Here’s how you can attract, befriend, and even train your very own crow army.
Why Choose Crows?
Crows stand out in the bird world for their remarkable intelligence and adaptability. Unlike other birds that can be more passive or hard to train, crows are known for their problem-solving abilities, social structure, and communication skills. They can recognize faces, forming bonds with those who treat them well. While they are very different from ducks (trust me, I’ve tried), crows offer an opportunity to build a relationship that can be both fascinating and, when necessary, a little bit devious. So, if you’re after a loyal, though mischievous, companion, crows could be your ideal choice.
Is It Legal to Keep Crows?
Before you get too attached to the idea of having a crow as a pet, it’s important to note that keeping crows is illegal in many places. While it’s perfectly fine to attract them to your yard and create a welcoming environment, keeping one as a personal pet may land you in hot water. In most places, crows are considered wild animals, and authorities typically discourage keeping them confined. So, if you’re looking to build a crow army, it’s best to let them roam freely and avoid trying to claim them as personal pets.
Attracting Your First Crow
To begin your crow-building journey, the first step is to make your space crow-friendly. Crows enjoy quiet, safe places where they can forage and socialize. If you’re in a suburban or urban area, you’re already halfway there, as crows tend to stick around human-populated areas. The next step is making your yard less inviting for potential predators—say goodbye to loud wind chimes, barking dogs, or curious cats. You’ll also want to add some greenery, like bushes and trees, where crows can rest and hide, as well as a birdbath to keep them refreshed.
Offering the Right Food
Once you’ve set the stage, the next step is to entice your new feathered friends with food. Crows are opportunistic eaters, so they’ll gobble up pretty much anything. However, to win their favor, try offering foods like nuts, meat scraps, or eggs—anything that will satisfy their hunger and make them see you as a reliable provider. To ensure your offering is noticed, place it in a visible, open spot, preferably with something shiny nearby to catch their attention. Don’t rush the process, though; crows are cautious, so patience is key.
Patience and Consistency Are Key
Just like any relationship, it takes time for the crows to get comfortable around you. If you’re consistent with your feeding times and locations, they’ll start to associate you with safety and food. They’re highly observant creatures, and once they begin to trust you, you can start getting closer to them. But don’t push it—crows have excellent memories, and any sudden movement or breach of trust could set you back.
Gaining Trust and Tribute from Your Crows
As you continue to nurture this bond, you’ll likely begin receiving gifts in return. Crows are known to leave shiny objects—like bottle caps or bits of metal—as a sign of appreciation for their benefactor. If you’re lucky, your crows might even leave you a valuable item as tribute, though I wouldn’t hold my breath for a diamond! These tokens are a testament to your growing influence over the local murder (yes, that’s the collective term for crows).
Crows Are Protective of Their Own
When you’ve earned their loyalty, you may notice that crows become protective of their territory. It’s not uncommon for a befriended crow to dive-bomb perceived threats or anyone who enters their space. One Reddit user shared an experience where their neighbor was relentlessly attacked by a group of crows while simply standing nearby. This is a good sign that your crows are becoming fiercely protective of their territory—and possibly, of you.
Turning Crows Against Your Enemies
One of the most intriguing (and mischievous) aspects of befriending crows is their ability to hold grudges. According to a study conducted by biologist John Marzluff, crows can remember and recognize human faces, even holding onto negative impressions for years. In an experiment, crows that were harassed by masked students would continue to scold and mob anyone wearing similar masks, even long after the original incident. This is where things get a bit devious. Once you’ve established a relationship with your local crows, you can introduce a mask of someone you’d like to see harassed—say, a workplace rival or that one neighbor who just won’t stop.
The crows will spread the word among themselves, and soon, your enemy will have an entire flock of crows glaring, cawing, and swooping at them whenever they appear. It’s like having a secret, avian army at your disposal—minus the need for swords or shields. Just be prepared to sit back and let nature take its course as your feathered friends handle the rest.
The Power of Your Crow Army
Once you’ve formed your crow alliance, your reputation as a crow master will spread. Your yard will be a hotspot for local crows, and your enemies will unknowingly become the target of your feathery squad’s displeasure. With patience, consistency, and a little bit of cunning, you’ll have a murder of crows at your beck and call, ready to help you with whatever mischief you see fit. After all, sometimes revenge is best served with a side of cawing.
This content has, in part, been generated with the aid of an artificial intelligence language model. While we strive for accuracy and quality, please note that the information provided may not be entirely error-free or up-to-date. We recommend independently verifying the content and consulting with professionals for specific advice or information. We do not assume any responsibility or liability for the use or interpretation of this content.